Evenings in the livingroom

Do you remember the old days when families would gather in the livingroom during the evening? Like the Cleavers, we sat around in our favorite chair, couch or floor spot. Some evenings we might be watching television. Other evenings each person might be doing something different - reading, doing homework, sewing or reading the newspaper - but we were all together. Once in a while Dad would say "did you see this in the paper today?" or Mom would say "Oh - the Jones's have invited is to their picnic on Saturday" and a brief conversation would ensue; later someone would look up from a textbook and query the group for an answer to a problem or announce in amazement that there was once a time when people thought the earth was flat. Ah, yes... We were each doing our own thing, but we were doing it together.


Recently I have heard people say that computers, the internet, smart phones, texting etc have pulled us apart; that "we no longer communicate the way we used to". And it's true - we need special etiquette memos to remind people about the correct way to conduct themselves when using cell phones and such in the office or social occasions; email and texting have replaced letters and phone calls; and we read more of our news online than under the byline. But this evening I witnessed a flashback to the future:


In our living room, with the evening breeze wafting in the windows, my daughter and son-in-law and I are all in our favorite seats. I have a knotted pile of yarn in my lap (in another blog I will share my latest attempt at learning to crochet, but I assure you the knot had nothing to do with my ability or lack thereof); my daughter is sprawled on the sofa with her laptop and my son-in-law is at the other side of the room with the desktop. It looks like we are not communicating at all. Then I ask Joy if she heard a comment someone made about her Facebook post last night about teaching me to crochet. We chat about my crocheting progress. More silence... then she laughs at something on a blog she is reading and her husband is reading the same thing across the room... they comment. One tells the other to see something on page 14... and so it goes... My husband has now joined us and is chatting with all three of us about an article he just read about Walter Cronkite - you see, his desktop is in a different room and he had been there for a bit.


So the conversation ebbs and flows. A laugh here, a shared story there, a comment somewhere else. And in between there is shared peace and quiet. Snoring beagles on the floor and chirping bugs outside lend to the ambience.


Yes, we may not be communicating the same way. but we can still share an old-fashioned evening in the living room. Each person doing his or her own thing and sharing bits of it - and themselves - with one another.

The Palm tree

Thus far I have written two books - both are collections of short stories - and hope the third collection is published this fall. When I think of time to sit and relax for twenty minutes, I call it "palm tree time". That's time for just relaxing, not trying to solve the problems of my life or the world; not trying to decide what to wear or make for dinner; not even praying. It's time to block out the cares and concerns of life and others. It's time just to "veg" - to watch tv, read a story (hopefully one of mine) or part of a book, or take a nap. Palm tree time is time to recharge the batteries that become so drained from the things we do and the decisions we make each day.



So every day, take some "palm tree time" for yourself - read, nap, do your nails... whatever it is that relaxes you and takes you away from the everyday cares of the everyday world.

Initial thoughts

I have just created this blog, and plan to use it primarily for posts relating to life as a "regular ordinary" woman over 50. All around us are magazines and ads for women who want to look younger, and wish they were younger (you know, the ones who won't admit their age?). There is advice for those who want to dress in the latest styles and wear the latest makeup trends - and for those who shop at the most exclusive stores!


Now we need someplace for those of us who buy clothes at discount stores and thrift shops, work in our own yards, go to church and the grocery store and flea markets ... just ordinary women doing everyday things. And some of the topics will be ... well ... ordinary - not just for women over 50!


So I hope you will bear with my ramblings, perhaps find some advice that you can use, and that you will share your own thoughts from under your Palm Tree. (next time - I'll talk about the Palm Tree)